Life isn’t easy for a Princess!

By Princess Shimmy On April 13, 2010

Hey bitches! Here’s a massive amazon gift haul for you to drool over.

The funny thing is, I was really fucking annoyed opening up all these packages. I need a maid or something to clean up after Me because the mess left behind is unbelievable. Where does this shit even come from? I can’t even remember who bought what! Hahahaha….

You turds love emptying your wallets out for Me on a weekly basis. And rightfully so! How often is it that you get to be a part of the life of someone so spectacular such as Myself? That’s right, never! You whores are lucky I even let you buy Me shit! Just look what I had to carry from the car to my apartment elevator!

Click on the images to see the full size!

I brought most of this shit home in an XXL garbage bag and still had packages I had to carry. The life of a Princess is not as easy as it looks!

Betsey Johnson heels…. loves it!

From top left to right: Cherry hair clips, cupcake design compact mirror, makeup bag, 3 luggage tags for when I go on vacation, lipgloss and another makeup bag and a semi ugly tattoo design purse I will be regifting. Hahahaha…

Kinder “Happy Hippo” chocolate and cigar shaped bubble gum. Mmmmm yum!

Bookends, mushroom shaped solar garden lights (loves it) and gourmet peanut brittle and candy.

The books on My wishlist got cleared out. From top left to right: SEO for Dummies (x2), Seasons of the Witch 2010 weekly planner, The Genie of the Universe Catalogue visualization kit, Mastery of Abundant Living law of attraction book, another fucking SEO for Dummies book, The Temple of High Witchcraft, Key to the Law of Attraction and two new Tarot decks.

** Oh and on a side note, you idiots bought Me three fucking SEO books. Brilliant. Even if it was only one book, I’d probably never end up reading it… but three?? Oh well, not My money! Hahaha.

Top left to right: Thigh highs, an ugly ass Hello Kitty checkbook wallet, Lancome lipgloss, MAC lipstick, Benefit Bad Gal Lash mascara, Too Faced eyeshadow kit, Smashbox lip palette, crystal anklet, 14K gold star shaped earrings and a Coach wristlet.

Hello Kitty tanktop and Obey the Oil Giant shirt. Loves them both.

Cute dresses and thongs. Sweeeet.

Funny story… the guy at the UPS store is always cracking jokes about the amount of packages I receive and automatically assumes I have a huge shopping habit and am buying all this stuff for Myself… I laugh to Myself and think why the heck would I do that when I have losers all over the world who do it for Me?

LOL! Anyways, since I go by the name Princess for My UPS packages, today he asked Me if I’m some kind of royalty or something and says I should call Myself “Queen” instead of “Princess.” I laughed out loud and just thought to Myself how funny it is that he unconsciously picked up on that. It really restores My faith in mankind when laymen recognize this level of Superiority. I personally think every single human being I come in contact with should be serving Me in one way or another…. hahaha…. but that’s just Me *insert angelic grin here.*